<When we last left off The Warlock and Mr. America had escaped from Hell with Neyzor Blades and Lucinda still trapped. Warlock brilliantly deducted he won’t have to choose who dies if they finish the S.O.F. Project because both will be released. The Grand Wizard drops The Warlock and Mr. America off at The Base after Warlock explains what’s going down>
Wi: This is too weird for me, but you better bring Neyz back alive.
W: I will. Stay here.
Wi: What?
Mr. America: Yeah, what?
W: Be right back.
*Warlock runs into The Base and runs back out holding the DVD*
W: We’re not safe here. I have a plan though. Take us to Thug D’s Place.
Wi: Whatever.
*An hour later The Grand Wizard pulls up to Thug D’s Place as Warlock and America get out*
Wi: I hope you know what you’re doing.
W: Me too.
*Wizard drives off as America and Warlock walk up the stairs*
A: Why are we here?
*Warlock knocks on the door, D answers*
D: What the hell are you doing here?
W: We need to borrow your PS5.
D: Oh no, you got yourself in some sick shit I don’t want to be apart of.
W: You don’t have to. Besides, you’re safe now. America and I have to finish what we started.
D: Not unless you tell me what’s going on.
A: Oh here we go.
W: Long story short 19 years ago Mr. Wallstreet, America and I started a Project called the S.O.F. Project where we’d pick characters in shitty movies and if our characters survived, we’d get a point. Whoever had the most points after 150 movies won. Well over the next four years we lost contact with a lot of our friends at the time and we pretty much stopped the project with 10 movies left. I put the DVDs in a box in my attic and left them there. Well, eight years ago I had a little fun with Satan’s wife Lucinda and Satan himself wasn’t too happy. He started sending the Demonic Toys after me but me and America would thwart them every time. Then they stole the souls of some of our colleagues and trapped them into movies we were supposed to see thinking they would be released as well to attack us. Problem was we never finished the movies we said we would so they trapped the souls into the S.O.F. Project films. Only we never finished the movies and I sealed the portal shut they were using to enter The Lair. Last week I decided to finish the Project and when we did the first three movies, we released our colleagues. The Toys found out and kidnapped you and others as collateral thinking we’d abandon the project. Instead we kept going and we’re down to two movies left. The only ones left trapped are Neyzor Blades and Lucinda, Satan’s wife. If I free Neyz, Lucinda would never forgive me if her soul was to remain in hell forever and I wasn’t about to let Neyz die. If we finish the Project, we can free them both. Problem is they came through the portal at The Base, we needed to go somewhere where they wouldn’t expect us to look. After wer’re done, we’ll seal the portal here and you’ll never be bothered again.
D: I have way too many questions. How did you meet Satan’s wife, why is everyone trapped in movies and how the hell are the Demonic Toys real?
W: Its a long story in itself and we don’t have time. Can we come in?
D: Fine, just get this over with.
*Warlock and America walk inside with D. America sits on one couch and Warlock in his chair. D puts the DVD in his PS5*
D: What are we watching?
W: You won’t be watching anything. This is between me and him. He’s got a one point lead over me and Mr. Wallstreet with two movies left. Save yourself the agony.
D: Fine, just make sure those damn Toys don’t return.
*D walks into his bedroom and closes the door*
A: Pick one.
W: BRIDE OF THE GORILLA.
A: What a name.
*Warlock turns to the camera*
W: Welcome to Thug D’s Palace as we wind down the S.O.F. Project here at Warlock’s Movie Realm. We only have two movies left and Mr. America still has a one point lead over Mr. Wallstreet and I.
A: Yes! Victory!
W: What started with 150 movies is now down to two and in second place is the 1951 science fiction horror film BRIDE OF THE GORILLA. Yes, that is the title.
A: So, King Kong?
W: Not exactly. No, apparently in the jungles of Central America a plantation manager goes insane, kills his boss and tries to force the boss’ wife to marry him instead. A witch doctor sees this and puts a curse on the guy to turn him into a gorilla.
A: That sounds stupid.
W: I agree, but we’re not looking for movie quality. We’re looking for body count and an evil gorilla man on the loose might mean some dead bodies pop up. Now I know one of the actors is Lon Chaney Jr who’s no stranger to horror films but the others I don’t know. Thankfully the movie is only 70 minutes long so if it sucks, at least it’ll be short. So grab your popcorn, grab your drink and grab your woman because its time for BRIDE OF THE GORILLA.
Written and Directed by Curt Siodmak
Cast:
| Barbara Payton | … | Dina Van Gelder | |
| Lon Chaney Jr. | … | Police Commissioner Taro (as Lon Chaney) | |
| Raymond Burr | … | Barney Chavez | |
| Tom Conway | … | Dr. Viet | |
| Paul Cavanagh | … | Klaas Van Gelder | |
| Gisela Werbisek | … | Al-Long (as Giselle Werbisek) | |
| Carol Varga | … | Larina | |
| Paul Maxey | … | Van Heusen | |
| Woody Strode | … | Nedo – Policeman | |
| Martin Garralaga | … | Native | |
| Felippa Rock | … | Stella Van Heusen | |
| Moyna MacGill | … | Mme. Van Heusen | |
| Rest of cast listed alphabetically: | |||
| Steve Calvert | … | Gorilla (uncredited) | |
| Art Felix | … | Native (uncredited) | |
| Augie Gomez | … | Native (uncredited) | |
| Tony Urchel | … | Native (uncredited) | |
*America reads the tag-line*
A: “The owner of a plantation in the jungle marries a beautiful woman. Shortly afterward, he is plagued by a strange voodoo curse which transforms him into a gorilla.”
W: Sucks to be him.
<After movie is over>
A: Ha ha! I lived. Now the worst I can do is tie.
W: Yup, you’re right. You have a one point lead with one movie left, if you survive or I die the next one, you win.
*Suddenly a green cloud emerges from the PS5*
W: Ah, here we go.
*Thug D walks out*
D: The hell is that?
W: I’ll explain later.
*A face appears in the cloud*
W: Neyz!
N: LOOK OUT! ITS A TRAP!
W: What trap? You’re free!
N: ITS A TRAP!
*Suddenly the cloud disappears and the Demonic Toys burst out of a nearby closet*
D: OH SHIT!
*D grabs one of his daggers as America raises the carbine rifle and Warlock flicks his wrist to make fire appear*
Oopsy: GET THEM!
*Warlock shoots a fireball that fries Mr. Static instantly as America shoots Jack Attack’s head clean off. Teddy wrestles with Thug D until D stabs Grizzly dead repeatedly. The three of them surround Oopsy Daisy*
Oopsy: Fuck….wasn’t expecting that.
*America aims his rifle at Daisy with D pointing his dagger at Oopsy’s throat*
A: Any last words?
W: Wait…..I got an idea. Let’s kill two birds with one stone.
D: How?
W: America….follow me. D, go to my lair. You’ll be safe there.
*Warlock fries the corpses of the fallen Demonic Toys into ash as he and America lead Daisy through the portal in the closet*
D: This is fucked up.
TO BE CONCLUDED
Warlock's Movie Realm 