*The Warlock, Mr. America and Neyzor Blades are in The Lair just watching TV when the Lair begins to shake*
N: Why does you keep doing that?
W: Its not me, I’ve been telling you for years now.
A: Well then what is it?
W: Just let it go.
*The Lair rumbles again forty minutes later*
N: Again with the earthquake? Make it stop.
W: I can’t, I’m retired.
A: What do you mean retired?
W: I…its….just let it go.
N: For eight years this place has rumbled like that and you’ve always said “Don’t worry about it.” I want to know why.
W: FINE! I’M SUPPOSED TO BE RETIRED BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, THE HELL WITH IT!
*Warlock gets up and goes up to the attic*
N: What’s he doing now?
A: Like he was doing anything before?
*Warlock returns down with a dusty little box*
N: What the hell is that?
*Warlock looks at America*
W: You know what this is.
A: Yes, because I can read minds. I see an old box.
W: S.O.F.
*America’s expression changes*
A: No….
*Warlock nods his head*
N: What is S.O.F?
A: Neyz leave…..please.
N: What? Why?
W: Unfinished business.
N: Not till you tell me what’s in the box.
*Warlock pulls out dusty DVD boxes*
N: Movies??? You mean to tell me this place has been haunted for eight years by MOVIES?
W: Not just any movies, but yes.
A: No…..no……
W: America is right, you may not want to be around for this. I have to make a skype call.
N: You and your stupid movies caused that?
*Warlock walks over to his laptop and America slumps in his chair*
A: S.O.F. after all these years.
*Warlock gets Mr. Wallstreet on the line*
Wallstreet: Warlock, nice of you to call me out of complete nowhere.
Warlock: We’re bringing back S.O.F.
*Wallstreet’s expression changes as well*
Wall: No……you can’t be serious. After 15 years?
Warlock: Its time to finish this.
Neyz: Will someone tell me what’s going on?
Wallstreet: Who’s even left at this point?
Warlock: Unless anyone wants to call Harris, its down to you, me and America.
Wallstreet: Do what you gotta do, let me know how it turns out.
Warlock: See you on the other side.
Wallstreet: Good luck.
*Wallstreet signs off and Warlock turns to America*
Warlock: Gonna be you and me now.
America: After 15 years.
Neyz: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?
Warlock: Alright I’ll tell you. Back in 2005 our group of friends started the S.O.F. Project.
*The box begins to shake as well as the house*
Warlock: Basically we would take movies and pretend we were the characters based on certain personality traits. If our character survived at the end of a movie, we’d get a point. The one who had the most points after 150 movies wins.
Neyz: Sounds like a waste of time.
Warlock: At first it was fun. We needed movies with high kill counts but not well known enough that we’d know who’d die. That’s how we started watching all those B horror movies that went straight to video. To save money I would buy those horror packs you’d find at the bargain bin at Best Buy. Well, as the years went on we lost contact with one friend after another and then by 2008 we abandoned the project with just Harris, Mr. Wallstreet, America and myself remaining. In the process, these box-sets I’m holding in my hand were never completed. They stayed in the attic all these years like a festering boil ready to blow. Every now and then the house shakes as a reminder that they’re still there. Well, its time to finish this.
Neyz: This sounds like a you, problem.
Warlock: It is. We’ll see you later.
*Warlock and America leave with Warlock holding the box of movies. They travel to The Base and walk inside.
America: So where we at before we stopped?
Warlock: If I remember right, you had a 2 point lead over me and 4 on Wallstreet.
America: How many are left?
Warlock: 10, I think.
America: Alright. Let’s get this over with.
*Warlock blows the dust off one of the discs and pops it inside America’s PS5. When the menu hits Warlock slumps down in the recliner*
W: Okay, we’ve already done Scared To Death. Let’s go with Good Against Evil.
A: Whatever.
*Warlock turns to the camera*
W: Welcome to The Base for the return of Warlock’s Movie Realm and a personal project of ours. 19 years ago next month our group of friends started the S.O.F. Project, or the Survival of the Films. Just to screw around the lot of us would pick characters in movies that we would pretend to be based on our character traits. If your character survived at the end of a movie, you got a point. Whoever had the most points after 150 movies would win the cash prize of two hundred dollars. Well, as the years went by we lost contact with our friends one by one. By 2008 we abandoned the project with 10 movies left……and now we’re going to finish it. Mr. America has a 2 point lead over me and 4 on Mr. Wallstreet. So we finish a project we started damn near 20 years ago, we’re going to start with a 1977 made for TV movie known as GOOD AGAINST EVIL.
*America sits in his computer chair*
A: The hell is that?
W: I have no idea. According to the box, a priest and a writer battle Satan and his minions.
A: Oh god…..
W: Exactly. This sounds absolutely horrendous. Apart from Richard Lynch and a young Kim Cattrall I don’t know any of the actors and its rated 3.8 out of 10 on IMDB.com. This is going to be awful but that’s not the point, the point is, will our characters survive? Let’s find out. So grab your popcorn, grab your drink and grab your woman because its time for GOOD AGAINST EVIL.
Written by Jimmy Sangster
Directed by Paul Wendkos
Cast:
*Mr. America reads the tag-line*
A: “A writer, Andy Stuart, teams up with an exorcist, Father Kemschler, to battle Satan, and a group of Devil worshipers led by Mr. Rimmin.”
W: Well the title did promise good against evil, least they’re not lying.
*After the movie*
W: That was almost good.
A: So I still lead by two over you and four over Mr. Wallstreet.
W: Alright…..what the hell?
*A green light emits from the DVD player and a cloud comes out of it*
A: What the hell is that?
*A face emerges inside the cloud*
W: Wait….is that?
*Warlock looks closely*
W: Nate The Average??
*The cloud speaks*
N: Warlock, been a long time hasn’t it?
W: What the hell happened to you?
N: You left me for dead with the Demonic Toys eight years ago, remember? Well they took me. Notice how you never heard from me again? You and your buddies there.
A: Wait, I can explain…..it was Warlock’s fault!
N: No matter, point is they want you Warlock. They want you real bad.
W: Why? I closed the portal years ago.
N: In the Lair, yes…..but we’re not in the Lair, are we?
*America slowly grabs his carbine rifle as Nate laughs*
N: Save it, Mr. America. They’re not here. In fact, you have more work to do. I’m not going to say anything else other than, I’m only the first. You got nine more to go. Thanks for freeing me though, maybe I’ll see you in another eight years.
*The cloud disappears and Warlock looks at the DVD player*
W: What does he mean by he’s only the first?
A: I don’t know but you better get this crap out of the base. I don’t need the Demonic Toys in here.
W: We need to finish this disc. Something tells me we have to finish it.
A: Oh come on…..
W: Nine to go.
TO BE CONTINUED
Warlock's Movie Realm 